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Posts Tagged ‘honor’

“Why French Kids Don’t Have ADHD” is an article from Psychology Today and is found here.  It is worth a full read.

From the article:

“French parents have a different philosophy of discipline. Consistently enforced limits, in the French view, make children feel safe and secure. Clear limits, they believe, actually make a child feel happier and safer—something that is congruent with my own experience as both a therapist and a parent. Finally, French parents believe that hearing the word “no” rescues children from the “tyranny of their own desires.”

This was of course the ‘American’ philosophy as well but it really is not an American philosophy, it is the Biblical doctrine and practice from the Lord Himself in the 4th Commandment, with Martin Luther’s concise teaching on it:

The Fourth Commandment

Thou shalt honor thy father and thy mother.

What does this mean?–Answer. We should fear and love God that we may not despise nor anger our parents and masters, but give them honor, serve, obey, and hold them in love and esteem.

In most of Luther’s concise teaching on each of the commandments there is a Negative and a Positive of the Law, including being a child and being a mother and a father.  It comes as a revelation in America’s popular magazine  Psychology Today that French parents actually say No to their children.  For instance: Just think about the use of the word “affirmation”:  without any discipline, no “No” so that  the child’s “self-esteem” is not hurt.  The tip-0ff to the real American philosophy of child rearing, not the Biblical one, which began with the elites telling Americans the way to parent was epitomized by Dr. Benjamin Spock in his seminal best-seller:  Baby and Child Care, first published in 1945.   I very quickly found these two quotes from Dr. Spock:

What good mothers and fathers instinctively feel like doing for their babies is usually best after all.

Happiness is mostly a by-product of doing what makes us feel fulfilled.

 So a mother or a father can run on her or his “feelings”?   It seems such advice of following one’s heart is the quagmire  from which  the exponential rise of  child abuse rose  in our generation.  Happiness is a by-product, but not from”FEELING fulfilled”, but happiness is a by-product of doing a task, a job, a service well.  “Feeling fulfilled” is amorphous, and I can feel good and fulfilled after a drink, a pizza and while we’re at, why not drugs?  A mom told her pastor that her one year old child is the “boss”.  I tried to gently correct her and I pray she hears.   “Amorphous” literally means without form.  God’s Law forms our lives. Limits are boundaries as “Forgive us our trespasses”.  There is no law in a feeling but there is Law in  God’s Word and disciples of Jesus Christ adhere to a discipline which is godly and humane.  Note that Luther lists “love” as the last quality in the 4th Commandment.  In The Large Catechism Luther correctly teaches that honor includes love. Note:  what Psychology Today, which is all about the somewhat science of psychology, is implicitly applauding in this article: spirituality, the spirituality from Law, as part of the remedy of ADHD.  

The Lutheran Confessions teach that all Scripture is correctly divided between Law and Promise (Gospel), that is:   God’s No and God’s Yes. I have preached, taught and  discussed that we have so relegated God’s No as “rigid” in our self-affirming, self-esteeming American society. Churches and congregations which try to teach God’s No and God’s Yes  are likewise considered too strict or worse, fundamentalist! If a political party is not “affirming”, it’s called “the party of no”.  And now we can see what happens when folks try to distinguish between No and Yes as in France and for many of you in  your own families.    With our self-indulgent, slothful child-rearing, we have sown the wind and have reaped the whirlwind, and it is children who are being spiritually, emotionally and physically hurt.  We can’t follow our heart, we should only follow God’s Word.  He knows more about us than we do.

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Appointed readingsRomans 6:1-5Mark 6:14-29

About this day:   In contrast to the Nativity of St. John the Baptist (observed on June 24), this festival commemorates his beheading by the tetrarch, Herod Antipas. From the perspective of the world, it was an ignominious end to John the Baptist’s life. Yet it was in fact a noble participation in the cross of Christ, which was John’s greatest glory of all. Christ Himself said that there had arisen none greater than John the Baptist. He was the last of the Old Testament prophets and also the herald of the New Testament. As the forerunner of Christ, John fulfilled the prophecy that the great prophet Elijah would return before the great and terrible day of the Lord. By his preaching and Baptism of repentance, John turned “the hearts of the fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers.” And in the footsteps of the prophets who had gone before him—in anticipation of the Christ whose way he prepared—this servant of the Lord manifested the cross by the witness of his death. (From theTreasury of Daily Prayer, p. 670.

Reflection:  let us remember why John the Baptizer was killed:

St. Matthew14: 3For Herod had seized John and bound him and put him in prison for the sake of Herodias, his brother Philip’s wife, 4because John had been saying to him, “It is not lawful for you to have her.”  

John taught the sanctity of marriage to the powers that be.  This is what cost John his life and his life is a martyria, a witness, to the Word in and out of season.

Marriage has been “out of season” (see2 Timothy 4:1-3).  As the years rolled on, I spend more and more time in confirmation classes, on the 6th Commandment, than on the other nine:  You shall not commit adultery.  From The Small Catechism by Dr. Martin Luther:

What does this mean?–Answer.

We should fear and love God that we may lead a chaste and decent life in words and deeds, and each love and honor his spouse.

In teaching this commandment,  I ask the class for the ways in which this commandment  is broken.  With more than a little bit of help by the teacher (!):  the dry-erase board fills up very quickly:  adultery, divorce,  “hooking-up”, living together, pornography, incest, masochism, sadism, masturbation, abortion, same-sex marriage, homosexuality, bestiality,  polygamy, etc.  Now our sexuality is not virtuous, never has been since Eden.  And then I point out that we are forgiven in Jesus Christ, upon His Cross, He bore our sin and is our Savior.  I take the eraser and swipe through the black ink a cross.  One year a confirmand exclaimed, “That’s heavy”.   Yes!  His Cross was heavy, as heavy as our sin.

John the Baptist bore the brunt  in preaching the sanctity of marriage in his day. We must also and in marriage be helpmates one to the other, modeled after Christ and His Church, His Bride and modeling to the world the marriage of two Baptized sinners in Christ.

This may be the first time in Western European history that the list above has been legally sanctioned and for a good part of society  and culture accepted. We are living in a neo-pagan, neo-Roman world, as did our forebears in the Church did from AD33 to Edict of Milan in AD313 (seeEdict_of_Milan). Ever more we need Luther’s counsel in the Large Catechism on the 6th commandment:

But because among us there is such a shameful mess and the very dregs of all vice and lewdness, this commandment is directed also against all manner of unchastity, whatever it may be called; and not only is the external act forbidden, but also every kind of cause, incitement, and means, so that the heart, the lips, and the whole body may be chaste and afford no opportunity, help, or persuasion to unchastity.

We need the lesson from John the Baptizer.  John was last of the prophets.  One of the verses that has haunted me is this one from Isaiah 52:11and it is cited by St. Paul in 2 Corinthians 6:17:

Therefore go out from their midst,and be separate from them, says the Lord,and touch no unclean thing;then I will welcome you…

This verse may be the basis of the Amish way of life, at least in the movie ‘Witness'(!) Does this mean we need to be like the Amish? St. Augustine preached on the Prophet Jeremiah which speaks to the Lord’s prophet, John, the way the Church is and should be as in 2 Corinthians 6: 17:

How many and vehement rebukes did Jeremiah preach against the sinners and wicked ones of his people. Yet he lived among them, he entered into the same temple with them, celebrated the same mysteries; he lived in that congregation of wicked men, but by his preaching “he came out from among them.” This is what it means “to come out from among them”; this is what it means to not “touch the unclean thing.” It means not consenting to them in will and not sparing them in word. I say this of Jeremiah, of Isaiah, of Daniel, and Ezekiel, and the rest of the prophets, who did not retire from the wicked people, lest they should desert the good who were mingled with that people. (emphasis my own)

“It means not consenting to them in will and not sparing them in word.”  The Lord has called His Church as the communion of His Will and Word, both of which are one.  As in the days of the Roman Empire, the Church did not consent with much of the pagan culture and touched not the unclean things. Do Christians fail in the sanctity of marriage?  Yes, but this can not be an excuse to continue touching unclean things and so sin (see  Romans 6:1-3) When we do sin, we know the terrors of hell and turn in repentance to the Lord Who died and rose for us.

This is still our vocation in marriage, according to the Lord’s Word of Law and Promise, not to touch the unclean thing.  Possible? Not on our own but only in Him are all things possible.  As John was a prophet, he did not spare them in the Word of God.  The Church can not either. Why?  As St. Augustine preached so that His people will be spared and I would add, as John and the Lord calls us:  to true repentance that sinners might turn to the Lord and live.

This means that marriage is a true good work by which the Lord preserves life in the world and by it He gives forgiveness:  see the Holy Family.  Marriage is a central means to love our neighbor.  From Luther’s Large Catechism:

God has also most richly blessed this estate above all others, and, in addition, has bestowed on it and wrapped up in it everything in the world, to the end that this estate might be well and richly provided for. Married life is therefore no jest or presumption; but it is an excellent thing and a matter of divine seriousness. For it is of the highest importance to Him that persons be raised who may serve the world and promote the knowledge of God, godly living, and all virtues, to fight against wickedness and the devil.

Let us pray:

Almighty God, You gave Your servant John the Baptist to be the forerunner of Your Son, Jesus Christ, in both his preaching of repentance and his innocent death. Grant that we, who have died and risen with Christ in Holy Baptism, may daily repent of our sins, patiently suffer for the sake of the truth, and fearlessly bear witness to His victory over death; through the same Jesus Christ, our Lord, who lives and reigns with You and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever. Amen.

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